Labor Pains

YEA we have 3 followers! I am soooo excited. People are actually reading it! I love it that Beth, co worker, said both that she laughed out loud at my prime rib episode AND that she could hear me saying it! In the words of Cheryl, my writing has VOICE!

So on to today, I told you I would write about Vallerie's birth or its other name "I think I have ruptured my bladder" so here goes. Some have hear this TONS of times so you can feel free to skip it! It still makes me and Michele laugh!


A little background knowledge is needed. I had Victoria a couple of weeks early from my due date. I didn't know I was in labor I just knew I had a backache. I walked around at work for a while until Jean told me that I must be in labor because NO one has back pain every 15 mins.
After a long labor I delivered Vic by a c-section. Where everyone in the hospital it seems got a glimpse of my V-jaja! (How do you spell that??)


Now on to Vallerie. I was HUGE and it was about a month before Vallerie was supposed to be born. I had scheduled the c-section so that I could be home by Christmas and in my mind when you schedule the delivery you no longer have to worry about labor right???


One morning around 5 am I felt this whoosh and then a trickle. I thought.. OMG I have wet myself. I ran (as fast as a whale could) to the toilet. I called the ex (we were married then...) to come help me. After I woke him I said, I don't feel any contractions and it is way to early to have the baby so I must have ruptured my bladder. Very matter of fact mind you! I know, this was ridiculous... but at the time it made sense! Maybe denial is a gift of mine!


I called Mom and said, "I can't stop peeing so my bladder must have ruptured because it was WAY to early for the baby." Again very matter of fact, no panic just normal every day bladder rupture.

She said, "Ahh okay I think that would hurt.

"No no I am not in any pain, so it can't be labor!"

She said, "I don't know but I will call Cathy."


In the mean time I get the ex to call Jean (can't live without her) and if he could please dress Victoria for school as I could not stop the trickle of "pee". Jean could take her to school until I could figure out how to make it stop.


Few moments later, Cathy calls. (this was in the last blog so I will make it brief) She thinks it is easier not to fight crazy just deal with it and move on. Hmm... words of wisdom that I should keep in mind on a DAILY basis!
She tells me to call the Dr.


In walks my precious 2 year old in fresh PJs. He has just changed her old PJs into new PJs thinking that since they were in the closet they must be normal clothes. They don't even look like real clothes!

So I call the Dr's office. I left a message and was told that she would call back.


In walks Jean, I told her I am not in labor I have just ruptured my bladder. She just looks at me on the toilet and takes Vic to put on real clothes. I think it is easier not to argue with me at this point. I am VERY matter of fact in my diagnosis and I am not at all scared.


I told the Dr on call. (Can you see the theme!) I think I ruptured my bladder.

She didn't argue with me. She didn't even try to tell me anything different. Must get crazy pregnant women calling all the time Just said that she would call the hospital and let them know i was on my way. She said in a very calm voice, "Well, just go to the hospital and they can see if it is the bladder."


OK. I call Mom, and tell her. I didn't even pack a bag because I just knew it wasn't time for the baby! I had to walk with towels between my legs and sit on a stack of towels so as to now get the exs car dirty. Then he wouldn't even valet park. I had to WALK with the dang towel in between my legs across the parking lot, up the elevator and to the nurses station. (we can see why my family LOVES Bill!)


I walk up to the nurses station and I said... (All together now)"I think I have ruptured my bladder because I can't stop peeing!" The nurse with a straight face says OOoooK and walks me into the room. I actually think I hear one of them say I waited around to see this!

The nurse has this little piece of paper and if it turns blue then I am in labor if not then we have a bigger problem.


It was DARK BLUE. Some would even call it indigo!
I said so I didn't rupture my bladder?




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